Who Am I Now

I am writing a poem, but it is more about what I know has changed about me (for example I can write  really deep poems:) and just in general how IB has changed me, a little too poetic probably....)

Who was I before you

Who am I now after you

Does it matter that I was a tortured and lonely soul

Or can it be that after your presence, my place in this world seems to be gifted

So many opportunities have knocked on the door

Not one seemingly wasted

I was hallow, emptiness in my world

Suddenly with all of your surprises, excitement overflows

There is no moment in vain

All of my happiness lies in the service of others

Creativity breeds, actions prevail

Throughout life I searched for one thing and it seems to finally appear

A new being

Who was I before

I was a soul

Now, with anticipation riveting through my bones

I am and I B the new form of benediction

Whitman

 

Walt Whitman

My Analysis:

Strangely, for me at least, the poetry in Whitman's book seems simplistic and ordinary. Diction is mostly colloquial and not elite. There are a few metaphors, but not to long, and his poem contains an allegory and similarly symbols. His poems are definitely different and fresh compared to the previous books we have read. His poems were for the most part easy to understand. However, the handwriting poses as an obstacle for the reader because the writing is sloppy and messy throughout the pages. I also cannot read cursive well, so that also contributed to my dilemma, but this was not to bad to read and understand overall. 

The pictures in the notebook are well drawn and one particular picture was interesting, the skeleton flying (picture is not loading or copying onto blog...). 

The pictures focus on the head, so particularly the emotions on the face. The body is relatively small and supposedly not as significant to draw. The pictures are of a man, maybe the character from the poem. They seem to illustrate the phases of different reactions of the man. He says, "I shall know whether there is anything in you", this makes me wonder Whitman's purpose of writing poems. I wonder if Whitman prefers to know the characters' inner thoughts than their actions. It also makes me question what kind of a man Whitman is as an author. 

New Observations:

Interestingly, Whitman seemed to admire Lincoln especially if he imagined conversations with him. "He may be suggesting that the ideal of liberty transcends and outlasts even the longest-lived political regimes." This supports the idea of probably why Whitman appreciated Lincoln. Whitman agreed with Lincoln and believed in liberty and to a certain extent equality. There is an unique version of viewing God. God having four sides, including Satan. That is something new and very weird for me to imagine. Largely due to this belief of God being a savior, so I don't view God having another side which Satan occupies. Religious feelings are often expressed during harsh times. People often doubt the existence of God or even distort the idea of religion. It seems like Whitman here has done something similar due to the profound effect of the arduous Civil War.

There are so many pictures in his notebook however they are not drawn by him. It seems that Whitman's physical appearance is strong by his broad frame and masculine by his height. His appearance did not seem to comply with his poetic nature as described by a sailor. He also like to have himself photographed like a celebrity; I wonder if he liked to show off. The last page serves as an enigma for everyone seemingly because it could either be a bizarre picture or it could adequately represent an allegory. If it is an allegory of America, then it sure is a weird one (lack of a better word) because of the contrasts present in the picture. All the pictures seem to be in a way realistic except the last one. 

The American Dream

The "American Dream" was a shared ideology common during the 1920s. This ideology encompasses many values and beliefs on which the foundation of America still stands today. Main ideas that most of America shares include freedom, individualism, nationalism, and motivation to purse dreams. The American dream during this era was in many ways what this picture describes. For example, a family who enjoys many of the unique privileges embedded within the society. This family above is having a picnic outdoors. They are enjoying the freedom and security the nation provides. Individualism as whole, this family is satisfied with their life and their individual position and status in society, specifically the family is separate from the society but together a part of the whole present in the nation. This family is responsible for its own fate and is a self-made family. They are also fulfilling the dream of a complete and successful family.

Wealth in my perception is an important item in the world. Many would say "It makes the world go round", in some sense I would respond yes. This is because money itself is used worldwide as a currency to purchase or own items. Ownership is mainly through obtaining and or showing off money, or in this case wealth. Ownership has in important existence in the world for not only ourselves, but also others. Emotionally, wealth is not an important factor to me because it limits my thinking and narrows my perception to a mathematical value. However, physically wealth holds a great importance for many and in many situations for me as well. I do everything right now to ensure that in my life I am blessed with enough wealth to not only provide for myself but also for the the people I care about. In my mind, wealth is a motivator for me and helps me rationalize myself sometimes during important decision times.

Poverty used to be a stigma in the minds' of Americans, however lately, this view has slowly been diminishing. Poverty is an important factor which many use to characterize individuals who are unfamiliar with each other. Although most think that poverty is a limiting factor and a stigma, in many ways poverty is slowly being accepted within society. This is something I believe because, for example colleges nowadays seem to recognize people's situation and they provide aid and many scholarships. This shows that poverty is not limiting people's education, but providing an opportunity to achieve more. Wealth is still an important concept for many Americans, but more abstract perceptions are evolving in accordance to wealth. This is seen by the various melodramas present in the media. There are two different sides of the spectrum with viewing wealth. Left is where wealth dominates some peoples lives, while the right is where wealth is meaningless and useless to life. I am in the middle and so are most of the Americans in my opinion. Poverty in my perspective is not a bad thing, in fact it can be motivator for some people to educate themselves more. Poverty is sometimes an uncontrollable condition, and many think of it as a limiting situation. For me, it is something that should motivate individuals to overcome his or her difficulties in order to leave poverty behind. Some people use it as an excuse for not being successful, but nowadays there are so many opportunities for success.

What's in a Translation?

Translation is deciphering another language into one's own language. However, more often translations are more likely to suffer through bias. This is largely due to the fact that every language has a unique structure despite its similarities to other languages. This seems to happen when some languages cannot properly translate the exact words from another language. For example, in the following quotes "bug" is substituted with "vermin". This can be the translator's bias in which he or she wants to intensify the effect of the language therefore he or she completely change the word. 

This makes translating a difficult task because bias is the biggest hurdle to overcome. A translator's bias is difficult to overcome because so often languages do not translate exactly. Different translations affect the tone and the mood of the reader greatly. Tone can change due to word choice of the author which affects the overall mood of the reader. Similarly, syntax can also affect the tone like quote #4 by using the commas to separate the order of events. It made the situation seem to happen almost suddenly. 

Metamorphosis by Franz Kafka

Original: Als Gregor Samsa eines Morgens aus unruhigen Träumen erwachte, fand er sich in seinem Bett zu einem ungeheuren Ungeziefer verwandelt.

(Got this amazing idea, so the darker the color gets the more effective the quote was on me.....)

#1:As Gregor Samsa awoke one morning from uneasy dreams he found himself transformed in his bed into a gigantic insect.
This quote was the second most effective on me. The diction in this quote is a little more intense compared to that of #2 and #3 but lesser than #4. Words like "uneasy" "gigantic" and "insect" make a unique effect on the reader compared to #4. Uneasy means causing or feeling anxiety.  In this case it makes Gregor seem like he is ill and currently sick, so the dreams are a side effect of the sickness. However, in #4 "agitated" makes Gregor seem like he is used to getting fits and violent dreams. Gigantic means huge or enormous. In this quote he is transformed into an enormous insect, but in the other quotes it says "giant" or "monstrous" so gigantic makes this quote seem different and it heavily emphasizes the size of the bug compared to the other quotes. 

"Insect" is used in this quote but other quotes use "vermin" or "bug". "Insect" makes the Gregor seem like an insignificant organism while "vermin" characterizes Gregor to be a despicable animal and "bug" makes him look like a tiny and annoying organism. There is no significant syntax because it is just one sentence. However, this different to #4 because that one had many commas unlike this one which is straightforward and without commas. The structure is simple and easy to understand because it is a single sentence. This allows for easy understanding for the reader reading the translation, this is different from #4 because of that one has many commas. Although this quote is much easier to understand, #4 is much more effective because of the word choice the author has chosen. 

#2:Gregory Samsa woke from uneasy dreams one morning to find himself changed into a giant bug.
This quote was the least effective on me because it is too simple and it has no complex structure or syntax. Even the diction is mediocre so this dims the effectiveness of this translation in specific. "Uneasy" is used once again to describe the dreams. However, only this quote used "changed" instead of transformed. This changes the connotation of the sentence overall. Changed makes the translation seem that Gregor turned different in his appearance, but transformed makes Gregor seem like he not only changed physically but also mentally. 

Similarly, the name of the character has also changed from Gregor to Gregory. This is unique to only this translation, all the other translated works use Gregor. This quote also uses "bug" like #3 and uses a synonym "giant". Giant for the most part is the least effective adjective compared to all the other quotes. The quote is a single simple sentence illustrating a morning where Gregor turned into a bug.

#3:When Gregor Samsa awoke from troubled dreams one morning he found he had been transformed in his bed into an enormous bug.

 Some diction words the author uses are "troubled"and "enormous" which is different compared to the other quotes. Troubled means having anxiety. In this situation, it seems like Gregor is having difficulty sleeping so that is why he found himself transformed into a bug. This kind of changes the meaning of the sentence, and changes the effect because he turned into a bug one time. 

Enormous means extremely large. This means Gregor changed into a large bug, however in the other quotes Gregor is described more in depth while this one says "bug". Bug is not effective at all compared to "vermin" or even "insect" because it sounds childish and insignificant. The syntax is simple once again without any commas or interruptions. The structure is a dependent clause in the beginning of the sentence with an independent clause. 

#4:One morning, upon awakening from agitated dreams, Gregor Samsa found himself, in his bed, transformed into a monstrous vermin.

This quote was the most effective on me because of the specific word choice the author uses. Diction words like "monstrous", "vermin", and "agitated" have the greatest effect on me from this quote because of the vivid details I imagine. This is different from all the other quotes that use not as strong synonyms for the words present in the quote. Monstrous means having the ugly or frightening appearance of a monster. Specifically "monstrous" makes me feel like the man has transformed into a monster who is pure evil in his intentions and actions. Vermin is defined as parasitic worms, insects or people perceived as despicable and as causing problems. "Vermin" makes the man less of a insect, he is a pest, despicable, or more of a disturbance to the society overall. Agitated is a feeling or appearing to be troubled or nervous. "Agitated" describes the dream to be more of a nerve-wrecking experience. 

For structure, there are also many commas making the sentence seem choppy and short. The event happens over a short period of time as demonstrated with this sentence. For syntax, the events that occur in this quote seem to be happening in order. First he woke up, then he found out he became an insect. The diction in this quote is the strongest that allowed for more vivid details for the reader. The events that occur seem like list of occurring details, instead of a story revealing the details like the other quotes. This quote also is the longest one that appears so it has a lot of description.

IOC!!!! :(

Planning of IOC 

Rubric Comments:

A- 6   I believe I was not too bad with remembering key details of this novel, and I tried to stick to the passage instead of going overboard with details of Handmaid's Tale. I tried to use textual details to show support from passage which hopefully demonstrated my understanding.

B- 5 Adequate awareness of literary stuff (analysis) with references to what effects it has on the reader. I talked a bunch of stuff about diction and details... 

C- 3 Kept having to pause to think... said a few ummmms.... hopefully still okay to give myself a 3 (leniency) 

D- 3 I was on topic and did not digress from the passage, hopefully was coherent even with the ummmms nice notes, had almost complete sentences and not just words spouting out of my mouth.

(10 min video takes forever to load on this blogpost thingy..... I sent u copy too it just is not working...)

Total: 17

"From Cancer to Dance"

How can you survive cancer? Ananda Shankar Jayant tells her story of how she conquered her disease through dance. Ananda, a dance teacher, danced all her life. After visiting the hospital, she finds out that she has breast cancer. As she struggled in the beginning with shattered confidence, she finds the stage as a hopeful platform to fight head on with cancer. Battling with hair loss and a weakened body, she regained a new perspective through dance and religion. She performs two styles: Bharatanatyam and Kuchipudi. The styles are very close to each other because both incorporate a lot of similar rhythmic movements and music styles. With all Indian dance forms, they are built on the foundation of Indian poetry, philosophy, and the Hindu religion. 

I chose this video primarily because I could relate to her story as I am an Indian, also because I have worked over four years in the oncology ward at Duke Hospital. I spent eight hours every work day in the summer with the cancer patients. I was a junior nurse taking care of the patients' needs and running basic lab work. Although it was a depressing job to see people suffering, some patients really turned their life around due to the disease. I saw how patients changed from every chemo, becoming stronger and more determined. I have heard countless survivor stories, but never have I heard a story like this. Dance never struck me as a technique to fight cancer because it weakens people mentally and physically. However, she was different. I was surprised with the immense amount of dedication she had for the art. All together, I feel empowered by her words that with a change in the mindset, I can turn around my life for the better. 

Ananda Shankar Jayant

This story's purpose it to change one's mindset positively to encourage oneself to fight against a relentless disease like cancer. Her intentions are to persuade and to teach the audience how to enlighten and reconnect with one's passion to fight any sort of difficulty. Apart from using pathos as a way of communicating with the audience, she uses an interesting technique in her presentation- dance. Another interesting fact is that the target audience is not just the Indian population, but people from different nationalities as well. People of all nationalities seemed to appreciate and admire Ananda's self confidence and her story. She explains that narrative dance is a metaphor for her. The story of each dance is specific to a God in the Hindu religion. This allows her to feel and communicate the message of each story. Dance is a symbol representing all the struggles she has gone through. 

This quote from her speech is especially motivating and it is the main argument she makes throughout her presentation, "Your mind is really your final frontier. I was able to take my thoughts and push them into my dance. I made it so that cancer was not a big deal. I would go and get my chemo, take the three days rest that my body needed, and then I was back in the studio dancing, teaching class or doing choreography." Ananda starts by presenting a Bharatanatyam, a energetic dance demonstrating her power, then she ends by presenting Kuchipudi. This form of dance reveals a sense of beauty, devotion, and physical art. Her performances capture the audience through her intense facial expressions and her hand forms which depict symbolic gestures to convey a message to the audience. 

Double Indemnity

Question 6. What types of themes are being explored here in this film? What do you think this film is about? What is it trying to say? Support your answer with specific examples from Double Indemnity.

Double Indemnity 

The film is about Walter Neff and Phyllis Dietrichson who are drawn to each other, and in their attempts to be together the couple commits a murder. Walter murdered Mr. Dietrichson in order to be with Phyllis, however, both are paranoid as their truth may be exposed by Keyes, Walter's boss. Initially, Walter devised a plan to make the murder of her husband appear to be an accidental fall from a train that will trigger the "double indemnity" clause and pay out twice the value of the insurance policy. However, Keyes refuses to believe the suicide story and deduces that Phyllis and another unknown accomplice killed her husband for the money. As the plot unravels, Phyllis is shown to have illicit connections with another man. Eventually, this causes Walter to shoot Phyllis and wait for the police to arrive.

Some themes that reoccur throughout the film are adultery, betrayal, guilt, sexual desire, seduction, money, and murder. Adultery drives the plot as Phyllis Dietrichson, a married women, has an affair with Walter Neff. Consequently, both of them scheme to murder Mr. Dietrichson in order to receive the double indemnity. Money is the primary motivator for Phyllis to partake in the crime,  and she gains Walter's support by seducing him. Sexual desire is obvious as both characters Walter and Phyllis are attracted to each other. Guilt appears when Walter feels responsible for the step daughter of Phyllis, Lola. This theme also shows up near the end where Phyllis feels guilty for involving Walter because she confesses to have not loved him. This causes Walter to kill Phyllis for her betrayal. Near the end Walter intends to pin the blame on someone else, but instead waits for the ambulance and police to arrive. 

I think the film is about lust and specifically about the power of women. Lust is obvious throughout the film and is a major reason for Walter to commit the crime. However, the power of women seems evident in the story due to the portrayal of Phyllis. She uses her strong points to lure Walter into her calculating scheme. Phyllis uses her looks to seduce Walter intentionally. For example, her dressing purposely shows more skin, the way she walks and speaks, and even her hair style is noteworthy. Makeup and jewelry are also used to accentuate her body to make Walter feel enticed by Phyllis. This shows that a women can to a certain degree control or ignite a man's lust; moreover, women can use tricks to make men more susceptible to their demands. Walter eventually agrees to carry out the plan to kill Mr. Dietrichson. I think the film is trying to say that women have power over men to a certain extent. The characterization of Phyllis may seem like the movie objectifies women, but Phyllis chooses to use herself in such a way and better yet does it knowingly. This shows she recognizes her figure as a powerful weapon, rather than a weakness. Therefore, I do not think the film intentionally targets women negatively. This film shows how women exhibited power over men during the old time, although it is shown in a different way than today's society normally thinks.